For the female demographic

Blog, I realize you are gender-neutral with a masculine vibe, so you may want to cover your eyes for this particular post. The subject is marketing, but it will seem like the subject is tampons. So, I’m sorry about that.

[Now I need to make the first image on this post something other than what I have planned for the second image. The first image is what appears on the Networked Blogs summary, you see. How about this nice pizza?]

Being a Marketing Babe by day, and offspring of an ad man, I find myself constantly analyzing the effectiveness of advertising campaigns. And I have to give an A++++ to Kotex for their new product “U.” Why does it deserve such a high mark? Because (and please forgive the TMI here) although I’m shall-we-say “no longer this product’s target audience,” I actually feel bad that I don’t need to buy any. Wow, that’s impressive--especially when the product is necessary for a reason no one actually enjoys.

First off, I just love the packaging. Davie and I were at a grocery store the other day and passed a display and I really freaked out. I mean, if this look were applied to jewelry or or stationery or bathroom décor, I’d be buying the whole line. I need to use this color scheme in some polyclay project sometime. It kind of reminds me of when we were little kids and did that art project where you cover a piece of paper with day-glo crayon colors, then paint over it with black, then scrape off a picture with the point of a scissors so the colors show through.

But the reason I most approve this product line is the absolutely priceless TV spots. Here’s the first one I saw:

“Oh, that's what’s supposed to happen.”  You gotta love an ad built on snide sarcasm. It expresses feelings we women may not even have known we had about ads for feminine products. All the clichés are spot on.  (Oops, pardon the pun I guess.)

And then I saw this ad, which I liked even better:

This one lampoons the whole business of marketing. Brilliant. As a Marketing Babe I enjoy manipulating the desires of the buying public as much as the next person, but I also admit to exactly what I do. Of course we marketers prey upon your emotions. And if we use clichés, here’s why: they are clichés because they work.

I am put in mind of the one 60-second spot I created myself, the book trailer for my vampire romance novel Bloodchained. You can check it out here if you wish, but I don’t necessarily expect you to lose a full minute of your life in that way.

Romantic music, hot guy, penetrating looks, the implication of danger and lust, a simple presentation of a classic conflict, a bit of suspense...nothing original there. Still, it was really fun to create and pretend for a day that I was some kind of filmmaker. Chah, right. Anyway, as I reflect upon this trailer, I realize I’d love to see a spoof of it. Because we marketers spend so much time passionately (and sometimes desperately) trying to sell stuff, having a good laugh at the whole business is really refreshing.

So thanks, Kotex and your ad agency. I’d give you my business, I really would. In lieu of that, you have the compensation of my having embedded your ads on my blog. And really, how do you place a value on that kind of exposure?

At the very least, it’s worth a pizza.

A real-life 1960’s Mad Men-style ad man: my dad

Dear Blog, today we are celebrating the birthday of another hero of mine: my dad. He’s turning 84 and persists daily in being a very cool and amazing person. I could discuss any number of interesting things about him, from his childhood in a rooming house during the Depression, to his current expertise at websurfing and devotion to YouTube. But in view of the popularity of AMC’s series “Mad Men,” I thought our readers might be particularly interested in his experiences as a real-life ad man.

Here is a photo of us enjoying ice cream cones circa 1963, the same year as “Mad Men,” takes place.  As you can see, my dad sported a look totally in tune with the gang at Sterling Cooper. (In fact, he bore a remarkable resemblance to Pete Campbell.) Back then he worked as a copywriter for a prominent ad agency in Milwaukee called Klau Van Pietersom Dunlap.

How much was it like Sterling Cooper? Well, he tells me if there were that many sexual shenanigans going on in the office, he wasn’t aware of them. However, the three-martini lunch was definitely an institution for many in the biz. And certainly the place of women in the Ad Game was very much like on the show; anyone aspiring to be like Peggy had a hard row to hoe.

Dad was promoted to a vice president at KVPD in 1968, an occasion I remember as very exciting to me at age twelve. A vice president! That sounded so important! I recall Dad telling me at the time though that it was not something I should go bragging about to my friends. He thought that kind of behavior was something to be avoided--a good lesson for me to learn.

Is it plausible that someone with a humble background like Don Draper could really rise to such prominence at an important agency? That sure wouldn’t happen today, but things were different in the 1960s. My dad always felt bad that he didn’t get to go to college, but his intelligence and writing skills made that no obstacle to his success. Those talents were what got him into advertising in the first place (at GE Medical), and it was hard work and skill that landed him at the agency and brought him great success over the years to come.

Blog, I just had to laugh during one episode of “Mad Men,” when they referred to “the Kimberly Clark account.” In fact my dad had the Kimberly Clark Papers account (meaning stationery and printing papers)! Perhaps his coolest project ever was an award-winning campaign involving the creation of a book about that famed tourist attraction, the House on the Rock. The book was designed to show off various types of Kimberly Clark papers. Dad interviewed HOTR creator Alex Jordan and wrote the copy. It turned out to be an amazing little book, back when HOTR was amazing and still little.

What about all the frightening office politics? Also very true to life, Blog. The old Ad Game is exciting but not always fun. When I was in high school things got pretty hairy, and eventually KVPD was merged into a larger firm, Hoffman York, not too unlike the situation on Mad Men this past season. Dad emerged unscathed, and began his in-house marketing career in 1975 as Advertising Manager of Master Lock. I realize we’ve passed out of the Mad Men era now, but Dad had some fun exploits at Master that are worth mentioning.

Master Lock is most famous for its “Tough Under Fire” campaign, which continued for many years and predated my dad. He worked on this campaign with Master’s agency, Cramer-Krasselt. That of course entailed working on the renowned series of Super Bowl ads that showed a lock being shot with a gun and still refusing to open. In 1989, a 30 second spot cost $675,000. But as Dad told a Milwaukee Journal reporter that year, “You aren’t buying 30 seconds, you’re buying 76 million people.” (In 2010, make that $3 million and 90+ million viewers.)

Dad interfaced often with the media and the public on topics related to locks and security. He also dealt with requests for using Master Locks in movies, like the time he took a phone call from Wes Craven. Yes, that Wes Craven. Mr. Craven wanted to use Master Locks in his movie “Nightmare on Elm Street.” They had a very amusing conversation; Dad had to laugh at the idea of the locks appearing in a slasher film. Wes Craven said, said “It may not be Shakespeare but the money is no laughing matter!” He even sent Dad an autographed photo of Robert “Freddy Krueger” Englund. Alas, Blog, it has been lost to prosperity, but it’s bright in my memory!

One of the most interesting times Dad ever had was when he was involved with the production of a 15 second TV commercial for Master’s “Tough Stripes,” lock, a high-tech bike lock introduced in 1987. He got to work both with models painted black and yellow and with a live tiger, as you see in these awesome photos, Blog! For 15 seconds of footage it took a day’s shoot in Toronto and two days of production time in Chicago.

Dad retired in 1991 but for several years afterwards had a small freelance advertising business. It’s in the blood, what can I say? Today I do in-house marketing in a position a bit like his at Master Lock, his granddaughter Katie does production art and internet interactive work at Cramer-Krasselt (yep, the same Cramer-Krasselt!), and his other granddaughter Amanda works in ecommerce at Kohls corporate.

Oh, and Dad’s a very passionate fan of “Mad Men.”

A big happy birthday to my awesome father, Russell A. Bauer! Want to send birthday wishes to a real 1960s Ad Man? Put your comments below...he’s also a big fan of this blog. :-)