May 27, 2010

Random Gripe Session #2

I've had a couple mildly aggravating days at the day job, Blog, so I thought I'd indulge my usual positive self in a little griping.  Just because people should care, here are a few more of my pettest of peeves:

1.  The thermostat double standard in my office.  Now in winter, heaven forfend we should expend precious dollars on heating the place.  No no, we are Budget Conscious and Green-Spirited.  Chah, right.  As soon as it hits 80 degrees out, the A/C is cranked to the frigid level.  My guess why, and see if you don't agree with me, is that all the thermostats here are controlled by males.  They are fine in the winter with an office that is 68 degrees.  But let it be 76 around here and they're sweating.  Budget Conscious?...Green-Spirited?  In a pig's eye, Blog.

Fortunately I am blessed to be a rare individual with both a door that closes and a window that opens.  So I counteract the chill air blasting from my A/C vent with hot air from outside.  Yesterday I got it up to 77 in there and was nice and comfy.  One of the guys came in and said my office was a sauna.  I laughed, just like they used to laugh at me in my snowmobile-suit-esque attire during winter in my former office.

2.  Cats who don't respect the carpeting.  Now Pookie and Cody are pretty well-behaved in this regard.  Particularly Cody, who along with his countless other virtues (yes, I am smitten with the you noticed) very rarely pukes.  No, I speak of Selke, who along with being the Champion Vommer of the Greater Milwaukee Area, now has taken to pooping in one spot in the studio.  Fortunately she doesn't pee (yet) and her gifts are the sort that are easy to clean up, but STILL, Selke! 

I know a person takes certain risks when bringing animals into the home.  I know you can't expect cats to put their toys away, not be completely in the way if you are working on something, or sleep on the one article of clothing or piece of paper that you'd like to get at.  But really, hard would it be if you must barf or poop to do it on the laminate or tile floors?  Why must you do #2 on fibers?  And why must you vom either on fibers or expensive electronic equipment?  Here's a REALLY radical idea:  the litter box!  Any of the three of them!

3.  People who dawdle at the green arrow.  We have a saying in our family:  "Look, dude, it's not going to get any greener or pointier."  If there's any chance that the people waiting behind you are not going to have time to turn left before that arrow is gone, you have a moral obligation to focus on the task at hand and GO.  That rule about car lengths you learned in driver's ed also applies here:  one car length for every 10 mph.  And turning cars are going between 10 and 20 mph, so those four car lengths you allowed were completely inappropriate.

I'm also bugged by tailgaters and people who won't let you merge or people who don't yield when they are supposed to.  All that stuff is selfish and risky.  But the green arrow problem is not risky--if you miss the light it will DEFINITELY cost you time.  It's not hard to care about the people behind you getting to their destinations as quickly as possible. 

Look, I'm not unreasonable.  If you're the only person waiting to turn left, take all the time you want.  Heck, sit there and let it turn red if you want, I don't mind.  In fact, I really think you should.

4.  Leaving doors and drawers ajar.  Just ask Davie how much this bugs me (and how little it bugs him, LOL).  I guess I am always bugged by illogical stuff, and it seems to me it's actually harder to leave things ajar than close them.  I mean, don't you have to consciously make yourself stop short in your closing motion?  If you close the thing all the way, the fact that its shut is an easy guide to stopping.  But if you want to leave it open a bit, you have to calculate the shortfall, don't you?

In our house the ajar problem has ramifications other than esthetics ones.  A drawer that is ajar demands that Cody open it if at all possible, and steal the contents.  He has lost my retainer a couple of times this way.  I wish he didn't have such an obsession with things that have my DNA on them, but what can I say, the cat is devoted.  (Please ignore the way I always spin his flaws into assets.  Thank you.)

5.  Telemarketers who keep calling every day even though now I have a Blackberry and don't answer if it doesn't recognize the caller.  This is insane.  No, really:  The definition of insanity is repeating the same act and expecting a different outcome.  This same principle holds true for the salespeople who call me at work and get put into my voice mail by the receptionist over and over.

Sometimes I'm sorely tempted to actually pick up and yell, "Look, what part of your past experience makes you think I'm actually going to answer your call?!?!"  But you see the problem with that, Blog.

Okay, time to turn the Randometer from "GRIPES" and over to "ANTICIPATED THRILLS."  In that category:  This weekend at our Memorial Sunday Cookout, at long last I am debuting The Neverending Ubiquitous Patio Party Playlist!  I even made this way cool sign to post.  Because I'm lame like that, and proud of it, Blog.

I feel better already, how 'bout you?


  1. Dear Diane,

    Good griping choices! I have to say that you may not like to visit Las Vegas in the summer...blazing on the outside, frigid inside (the casinos). And I was behind a green-light-arrow lingerer this afternoon (with cold eggs and milk in the car!)

    On a better note, enjoy your Memorial Day Patio Party! Wish Chris and I could be there, too. Chris did assemble a cast-iron hibachi today, and we have a couple of flat irons on deck. Ever try a flat iron steak? They are tasty and economical!

  2. Fortunately, Jennie, we walked everywhere when we were on the Strip...I could tell that traffic would make me nuts! But it was nice going in January when dressing the same inside and out worked pretty well. I know in the warmer temps I have to carry a warm sweater around while roasting!

    I wish you guys could come too! That would be a dream come true. Very cool about the flat-irons. I haven't had one but they sound delish. Growing up, my family had a hibachi and we used to cook hot dogs on it on the patio. I just loved that! Classic 60s suburban living. :-)